Understanding?

Do you have those moments when you feel like life is starting to make sense? That maybe, just maybe you are beginning to understand the recent events. That it's starting to make sense. There is hope for the future and excitement. Something I dream of is within arms reach.

In the matter of one phone call all that was dashed.

I don't care that I didn't get the job. I'm okay with it. I don't want to be somewhere that wasn't where I was suppose to be. This just means that God has something else for me.....right?

But what is hard is the rejection. Is the feeling that for some reason I wasnt enough to do a job that I would have poured my heart and soul into.

What is also hard is once again I'm back to not understanding or even have any idea. I hate it. ha. I wish I understood the past two years of my life.

Don't get me wrong I am thankful for many things in my life! I have so much to be thankful for and my life isn't terrible at all. I just wish I understood what God was doing in it and where He was taking me.

Life is a journey. I just don't have the answers to where it's going or why it's where it is now.

And. I. Hate. That.